Various Trials

Yesterday was a very very bad day for me. Had some issues with my skewl loans, which caused issues with my class schedule (which is getting more important since I’m near the end of this long journey called an “education”), which led to trouble with my health insurance through the skewl, and on and on we go. It was definitely the most stressful day I’ve had in a long time. But the purpose of this entry is not to whine and complain. I’ve done enough of that to myself already, believe me. I have been terribly convicted by the Holy Spirit of God because throughout this entire difficult day, I didn’t trust God.

I worried … a lot. I let the stress affect me to the point that others around me could tell I wasn’t myself. It wasn’t as though I lashed out at anyone. But I wasn’t cheerful. I wasn’t joyful. Because I sought my happiness from my present situation, I was unhappy.

As I’ve reflected over the past day, one passage of Scripture was burning within me:

“1James, a bond-servant of God and of the Lord Jesus Christ, To the twelve tribes who are dispersed abroad: Greetings. 2Consider it all joy, my brethren, when you encounter various trials, 3knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance. 4And let endurance have its perfect result, so that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing. 5But if any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all generously and without reproach, and it will be given to him. 6But he must ask in faith without any doubting, for the one who doubts is like the surf of the sea, driven and tossed by the wind. 7For that man ought not to expect that he will receive anything from the Lord, 8being a double-minded man, unstable in all his ways. 9But the brother of humble circumstances is to glory in his high position; 10and the rich man is to glory in his humiliation, because like flowering grass he will pass away. 11For the sun rises with a scorching wind and withers the grass; and its flower falls off and the beauty of its appearance is destroyed; so too the rich man in the midst of his pursuits will fade away. 12Blessed is a man who perseveres under trial; for once he has been approved, he will receive the crown of life which the Lord has promised to those who love Him. 13Let no one say when he is tempted, "I am being tempted by God"; for God cannot be tempted by evil, and He Himself does not tempt anyone. 14But each one is tempted when he is carried away and enticed by his own lust. 15Then when lust has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and when sin is accomplished, it brings forth death. 16Do not be deceived, my beloved brethren. 17Every good thing given and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights, with whom there is no variation or shifting shadow. 18In the exercise of His will He brought us forth by the word of truth, so that we would be a kind of first fruits among His creatures. 19This you know, my beloved brethren But everyone must be quick to hear, slow to speak and slow to anger; 20for the anger of man does not achieve the righteousness of God. 21Therefore, putting aside all filthiness and all that remains of wickedness, in humility receive the word implanted, which is able to save your souls. 22But prove yourselves doers of the word, and not merely hearers who delude themselves. 23For if anyone is a hearer of the word and not a doer, he is like a man who looks at his natural face in a mirror; 24for once he has looked at himself and gone away, he has immediately forgotten what kind of person he was. 25But one who looks intently at the perfect law, the law of liberty, and abides by it, not having become a forgetful hearer but an effectual doer, this man will be blessed in what he does.” (NASB, Bold Emphasis Mine)

There is so much in this text that applies to my situation.

The Holy Spirit has reminded me through His holy Word to be thankful in ALL situations. God has purpose in everything that happens in my life – the good and the bad. I need to have faith and not doubt. God is the Sovereign One. He has planned each of my steps, so why should I worry?

The moment my terrible circumstances began to overtake me I should have gone to God in prayer. I should have reminded myself of the promises of God.

Is not our God the Deliverer?

Does not our God have only good intentions for His elect people?

I should have been a doer of the Word, and not a hearer only.

By the kind intention of God, He has granted me repentance and shown me my error. But I am humbled. I’m reminded once more that I need God’s sustaining grace to make it through each and every day.